Stackchain for Newcomers: How I Infiltrated the Stackchain.

Koby @a_koby

Day 69: I am reporting from deep inside the Stackchain back channels – they still don’t’ suspect that I am the mole. I am making this report public so that others can understand how to navigate within this dangerous group. I’ll recount the basics and then uncover the secrets of the chain.

First, what is Stackchain? 

I have broken it down into this simple formula.

Stackchain is Twitter Post =

For the non math majors: Stackchain is a series of Bitcoin purchases in a twitter reply chain. To add your stack, follow these steps.

1. First, you need to find where to post. Find the chain you would like to post on. For general purposes, search for #stackchaintip and sort by latest. Find and reply to the Tip.
2. Next, in your tweet, use #Stackjoin + your USD amount of the Bitcoin you purchased. Add a picture of your purchase(remove personal info). Add any memes or content.
   1. Example : #Stackjoin 25
3. Finally, withdrawal those stats to cold storage.

2nd: Who is the Stackchain? 

At its core, these are the most highly regarded people to walk twitter. They only know how to stack sats and say GFY. Often seen fighting in primal internet battles with frequent rage quits. You should not take anything they say as financial advice. They are also top memers and the best frens you could ask for. Stacking Sats, Stacking Memes, and Stacking Frens is their motto and lifestyle.

Thrididly: Joining the Stackchain? 

So you have decided to join this group of pysco stackers? You will need to stack sats on the stackchain. Follow formula above and view previous examples by searching for #Stackchain. Continue to stack several times. Now that you have the hang of stacking, it is time to learn their culture and edicates!

3¾th: Assimilation in the Stackchain.

Observe the memes and their attempt at the English language. They are barely literate so you must be fluent in both emojis and gifs. Pay close attention to the latest fads as the stackchainers will reference it quite often until a new trend appears. Do not be startled by fights between stackchainers, this is quite a common occurrence. 

Follow everyone who comments or likes your stacks. Like and comment on their stacks as well(Pro Tip: add a GFY in a comment every so often, it is how stackchainers greet one another). Join Stackchain Spaces. 

Now, after some time, the back chats will begin to notice your incredible stacking and they will measure your regardedness levels. Consistency and Memes are greater than $USD value stacked. Keep stacking and following what you have learned! 

Warning and Disclaimer: 

Stacking sats may or may not cause the following side effects: Notification overload. Loss of brain cells. Forking. Hash Jacks. Stack Raids. Uncontrollable stacking. GYF. Highly regarded group chats. Stackchain spaces. Burnchain. Stack Fights. Rage Quitting. Creating 10+ alt accounts. 

Congratulations! You have now become a fully regarded #Stackchainer. 

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Note from Stackchain Magazine: No Bitcoin (or inferior monies) were exchanged for this article. Koby is honestly the friendliest fed you could ask for. We never give our feds enough credit for the amount of time they spend on us. You should follow him at @k_koby on X or tip him at kobysatpreservation@getalby.com . Remember if you’re cold, your feds are cold too.